So, you have probably spent a bit of time thinking about what you would like to do or achieve this coming year for yourself. But, have you considered what your goals are for your intimate relationship?
As we all know, having individual goals helps us understand what we want for ourselves and gives us the ability to project the future and what actions and behaviours we need to support prosperity and growth for ourselves.
What is also equally as important is for you and your partner to set your relationship goals for the coming year.
I see so many couples struggle and distance themselves from one another because they set individual goals for their relationship and fail to work together and collaborate on a common goal, one that will help their relationship grow and nurture.
Have I got you thinking?…
What goal would you like to see the two of you establish for the coming year?
Now don’t worry if you cannot come up with an idea, I’ve got some ideas for you.
Here are my 5 best goals couples can set for 2022.
1. Put the wellness of your relationship first.
I see many couples prioritise the needs of others over and above their own. This includes children, family members, work and friends. Putting the wellness of your relationship first will strengthen your connection through trust, intimacy and communication. When the two of you are happy and strong in your connection, you are more inclined to work as a team and when you work as a team, your children and others will absolutely benefit from your consistency, security, happiness and more importantly…love.
2. Focus on being fully present in those times when your partner needs you.
Distraction and avoidance in important moments can be a dagger in the relationship bond. When you are not fully present and not fully hearing what your partner is communicating with you, it can encourage angst, resentment and ultimately emotional distance between the two of you.
Research has shown that women are happier when their partner connects emotionally and know when they’re upset. The same research has identified that men too appreciate when women are able to clarify and express emotion and how they are feeling without the hint of blame or accusation.
It is important that you both learn to recognise when the other person is upset and try not to fix or offer advice (unless asked for) just be fully present, show empathy and ask open questions to help you learn more.
3. Respect each other’s love language
We are all unique individuals and for that very reason, our love language will most likely be different from our partners. We can often fall into the trap of giving our own love language to our partner only to feel disappointed when we don’t receive it in return.
Here are the 5 love languages according to Gary Chapman:
- Quality time
- Physical touch
- Words of affirmation
- Acts of service
- Gifts
4. Strengthen your relationship by including autonomy
The definition of autonomy is independence in one’s thoughts, actions, feelings and behaviours.
Everyone needs some time to explore their own passions, thoughts, and meaning in life. Doing this mentally and emotionally recharges and energises our physical and emotional selves.
So, does this theory apply to relationships? Prioritising quality time (love language) with each other and away from others can re-energize your connection and recharge your love for one another.
5. Be your partner’s biggest supporter in 2022
This can often be couples’ greatest challenge because we can get stuck in our own mindset of what is right, wrong, or better. There is no greater antidote to feeling loved than knowing your partner has your back no matter what.
Successful couples are ready to support their partner’s dreams, desires, and needs, they stand beside each other without judgment, criticism, blame or fear. They give their partner the space and support to grow.
So, there you have it, the 5 best goals couples can set starting today!
Important note: don’t try and achieve all of these goals at once, choose one or two and focus your energy on achieving the results you both want to see from your couple goal.
There is no better time to set your relationship up for success than now!
Have a go and good luck.
